Pandemonium in the press office at the King Gip Bowl as legend Dennis Blissett announces his retirement on the morning of the first round of matches of KGB XX!

“I told the gaffer a few weeks ago that I feel worthless with regard to my fitness levels these days”, said Blissett. “Plus I found it so hard competing against my beloved Gloucester Gipsies in last year’s KGB.

“I said I would never let the side down and drop out without a replacement, but fortunately the gaffer has managed to complete some business in the 11th hour.”

His replacement is none other than former Wegi youth product, Bau Tori, an integral part of the early Wegi teams, who signed on the dotted line for £2.1m.

“I was honoured to make a few KGB appearances as a kid. Now I’m ready to take it by storm”, said Tori.